“Wow Mom This Mothers’ Day!”, “Show Mom You Care” and my personal favorite, “Don’t Forget Mom!”. All highly unfortunate subject lines from emails I’ve been receiving in the last few weeks. Of course, these emails are generated by a computer on the off chance that I’d like to buy personalized chopsticks or gift certificates for a foot massage. They don’t know that our mom is gone. It’s nothing personal.
And that’s how I’m trying to think of today, our first Mothers’ Day without Mom. The TV ads, the window displays and radio haven’t forgotten that this is a bit of a sore spot for me. They never knew. Last night Garrison Keillor read off hellos during his Prairie Home Companion broadcast and that stung. I had to turn the channel because it’s hard to hear people talk with so much love about their moms right now. Especially today. A client sent me an email that said “Happy Mother’s Day to you and yours” and I had to remind myself to take it in the spirit it was said. It would probably be bad form to write something back like “get bent” or “eat my head”.
I miss her every day. I know that Dad and Kristin do, too. These days leading up to Mothers’ Day just made me feel like a walking bruise when I thought that I was making some progress. It seems hardest not to have a mom when everyone else is celebrating theirs. I hear them talk about shopping that needs to be done or plans that have been made. I wish that I could so casually do that kind of thing now.
And let me be honest with you. I was never great with Mothers’ Day when Mom was alive. I’d either overcompensate for not being in town by buying $100 FTD messes or procrastinate until I just plain forgot and then called to say that I’d bring something when I visited, which I usually did, but I’m sure she knew that I was being lame. And I always thought, and I pray that this is true, that she knew that I might be crap at certain holidays but I never loved her any less than the kids who got their moms well thought out gifts.
I feel very lucky that Mom was my mom. Kristin and I have always been very proud of the parents we were assigned. Nothing that has happened in the last few years has changed that, which is no surprise. Not everyone has this in their lives and I’m reminded quite often of just how good I have it. I just wish she was here, that’s all. I do think that it’s good that we all think about our moms today, wherever she may be. That’s why “the kids” are buying me dinner tonight. They’d make it for me but picking fur out of my spaghetti was never my favorite so this is just as good.
Oh, and happy Mothers’ Day to you and yours.
We will celebrate Nancy on Mother’s Day wtih you! She certainly was a steller Mom wtih wonderful daughters! She did that Mom-job very well.
Love ya darlin’
I wholeheartedly agree with the Recommender.